My boyfriend is on dating sites; Is he cheating?
SBMD or its licensors have no liability or responsibility to users of the SBMD Site or any other person or entity for performance or nonperformance of the aforementioned activities. So what does he say about it? So what is his excuse? Couples counseling or that sort of thing. Now the innocent leering at younger women who walk by has taken on a whole new meaning. My husband passed away 4 years ago.
As a third party observer, I would say — wake up! He has concluded you are not the one. He is not exclusive and you are setting yourself up for hurt by continuing…. Sometimes I wonder whether men are capable of fidelity at all…. When I logged on, the website said I had five messages waiting — so thinking they were mine, I opened up the box, not realizing it was his box until I got in…. It was sad — he is pressing 60, I am upper 40s.
We are for all intents and purposes a committed couple, and yet he has an online profile in which he is looking for women my age , meaning I am the upper age of what he is looking for. I felt crushed, that our relationship was a mirage. Any illusions about his caring were shattered that instant. I always liked him as a friend, enjoyed the physical part of our relationship, we are immensely compatible and help and support one another. I never felt he was my soulmate nor the flutters of love, stuff I had dismissed as adolescent tripe.
I had felt those connections with men in my past only to be hurt beyond repair as I was so emotionally invested. My bf and I were two independent people who completed each other. I had thought of marrying him as he is my physical type and we make each other stronger, better and provide companionship.
I could see myself growing old with him. Now he is just some old skeezy guy looking for young girls. All the women were my physical type, except younger versions of me. Now the innocent leering at younger women who walk by has taken on a whole new meaning. I think online dating sites have done immense damage to monogamy and relationships as there are an infinite number of possible partners for everyone. Since women tend to prefer monogamy, we are the ones who get hurt as even though we commit, our partner is still keeping his options open.
Of course, I am too in a way — as if the perfect man walked into my life tomorrow, I might consider him, but I am not actively looking or leading a fantasy life. As I said, I wonder whether men can be trusted. We had what seemed to be a monogamous relationship — he sees me every day, texts, calls all the time…. I found out that my bf of 4 years been meeting up with bunch of random girls online, exchanging phone number and and he went out for couple of date but ended up not interested in any of them when he sees them in person.
He recently proposed to me when he find out that I am pregnant. He always tells me that he loves me yet he is on line searching for other women. I confronted him and he said I pushed him away by not giving him attention and arguing and fighting with him, he is not remorseful at all. Now I broke up with him for good and changed my phone number and blocked him from my fb as well. I rather be single than being with a person that I cant trust anymore.
And Im scared because he dosent have any real family, his mum passed with cancer when our 1st was born and he does not know who his father is. So its just us and I have a big family, I mostly feel sorry for him, Ive given up my friends and family aswell to give him everything, also I do just about everything for him and with 4 babies under the age of 4 the stress of it all as well as having to care for our babies is getting more stressful.
Arrrrgh, I havent been able to talk to anybody really about all this so this is a big rant I guess, but I do feel a bit better letting it all out, just a bit of relief I guess knowing Im not the only one going through it…….
Relationship with a man, there is no reason he should be active on a dating website. Is thia bs exceptable…. She is wondering if this is alright, and if she should address him…. The content of www. Sayeh Beheshti, MD, Inc. The content is not intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment.
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When it went all pair shaped the first thing i did was check the history of the computer and lo and behold he was on the dating sites. In fact he had been up on the dating sites 8 months including while we got engaged. The humilation that was felt you can not believe. Sorry OP, but he does not think much of you at all if he still after talking to him has not taken his profile down and it suggests to me he is not as happy or as committed to you as you are to him.
Personally i would say if you dont take it down we are done end of, i deserve to be treated better than this. You're a "get me by" til he finds what he really wants. Yeah you can trust someone or not by their actions and he is showing you that he is making himself available for new opportunities--and he even took the time to update his pictures! I would be furious, and it would be clear to me he didn't respect me if he can't simply take his profile down or make it clear he is in a committed relationship.
Personally because I know this is such a universal issue amoung online daters before I got committed to someone, I would make sure our values matched, particially find out how he felt about profiles being up after serious with someone, if he didn't see it as an issue, I would say goodbye.
Seriously though, here's a novel idea: You tried talking to him, and instead of getting off the site, he upgraded it! If you wanted to give him one last chance to do the decent thing, why not ask him how he would feel if the boot was on the other foot? If he thinks anything of you, this might wake him up a bit. I told him that it was his choice if he deletes it or not.
The reason I ask is that for example I may have an account here or there that I don't use and where by now I forgot the user ID and password.
Did it show activity or recent logon? He may simply not use it and not bother to delete it. I had joined a site called m atch do t com. The had a special if you did not find a person within the first 6 months you got 6 months free.
I met a girl and when we met I told her i had 10 weeks left before i had my free 6 months. I told her I was not going to take my profile down. I thought she was joking. After 3 weeks of dating I felt bad for her so I deleted my profile which removes the 6 month free part. I broke up with her and no longer had my 6 month addition.
I will no longer delete a profile for someone until we have dated for months. Oh I may modify it but will not delete. I have spoken with him about this about a week ago now - and told him that it makes me uncomfortable. OP, these are major red flags. My thoughts are that he should be updating his myspace to say "In a Relationship" and adding pics of his hot new gf -- and getting off the dating sites.
In other words making himself less available, not more available. As some have already said, he is still looking. I hate to say it, but at this point it's dump or be dumped. ASK him to delete them, or to put not single not looking. They are bothering you. They are causing mistrust. You need to explain how you feel to him. Don't make demands, but if changing the status or deleting them is a 'need' for you, he should be repectful of that need.
If he doesn't then the only way you can be sure of his actions is to have a freind try and contact him just to see. He may not be doing anything wrong at all, just having a little innocent fun. But like I said, if this is a need for you, he should be able to compromise for you. If not, and if you can't handle it, then that leaves you with one choice. Move on, and let him have his fun alone. In the future, it would be to your benefit to read the entire thread before posting.
If you have both decided to be together exclusively then he is being a dork, if that is not listed in his profile. On one hand, your boyfriend has been turning to other women for sexual gratification—leaving you feeling hurt, betrayed and rejected.
The feelings that you are experiencing now are very similar to what people experience when they discover infidelity. At an emotional level there is very little difference between discovering different types of cheating—it all hurts just the same see what counts as cheating. The experience can be extremely rewarding—exciting, stimulating and fun. But, the problem with this is twofold: The high reward and low cost nature of online cheating makes it difficult to stop.
But from your perspective, it is REAL; it feels like cheating and it hurts just the same see online cheating. And it may help to be realistic about how much both you and your boyfriend can change with respect to this issue.
So, our best advice is probably the most difficult. Set a smaller, but more manageable goal for right now.
Imsges: why does my bf go on dating sites
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I have a sense of humor which comes through in my writings. If he thinks anything of you, this might wake him up a bit. I had joined a site called m atch do t com.
In the beginning, I knew he was on an online dating site. What is he prioritizing? If he really wants to hide it from you he will. And does he respect you or asian dating sites pictures There are some questions that I want you to ask yourself before you decide whether or not you say anything to your boyfriend:.
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