You're Still Mine || Ongoing || Jungkook x You
Were I in your situation, I would make it clear to whomever I was dating that absolute commitment was of the utmost importance to me. Never apologize for checking up on a person who has lied to you and promises to do better. I have been dating this guy I met on okcupid for a few months now. So we met and he told me he was glad I had pushed him out. Saturday, November 30, by Jessica Booth. I started talking to a girl for around 2 weeks, we met on a dating website and have been talking daily.
There’s a difference between liking his ex’s status and liking 20 of her vacation photos at 3 a.m….
Saturday, November 30, by Jessica Booth. So we met and he told me he was glad I had pushed him out. I have read that many complaints from match is the status option is flawed and can be triggered from simply receiving and deleting a email from match in your personal account. And I am not going to ask him about what he wants to do. Between Monday and Thursday I noticed he was logging in.
We give a dance class together, found out that he cheated on me with one of our students. I still have to see them this month because we have a big event so the no contact rule is preety rough for me, and now in every class he treats me with anger and he is not like indiferrent to see me he just gets like mad, so I think he still feels something even if he is in another relationship… Any help? So my X and i have a complicated past. We kinda knew each other growing up in a small town.
I went on with my life. At 29 with a marriage and two kids. My then husband and i were at a club. I literally locked eyes with this guy. That was it he came over, said hi to both of us he knew both of us from 12 years ago but even though we were both with other people, i just knew.
My already horrible marriage made it easy to have an affair. So we carried that on for a year. It wasnt the right time. This is 10 years later now. I have had on and off contact with him FB mostly. I am married to an amazing man. I cant shake my X. Im drawn to him. We are km away from each other, 10 years has passed, i tell myself im being stupid but i cant stop. He accidentally called me couple times. I just Love him. I would like some advice. We broke up about a month and a half ago because we jumped into things and they were moving really fast so we decide to stay friends.
Last night he took me out to dinner, gave me a massage, put lotion on my sunburn, hung out talking for hours, and I ended up staying the night and sleeping with him. In the morning he woke me up to kiss me good bye when he left for work and I stayed at his place and went back to sleep.
My ex says to me that he like a girl but its to try to get over me but he says its not working what does that mean. Why he will call you even if he has a girlfriend. My ex boyfriend wants to be friends. However, we broke up due to arguing quite alot. We have broken up once before which was my decision, but we then got back together and everything was going perfectly. But he is all I want. What should I do? I really want him back!
I smell trouble, trouble…. Good Luck with that. Gurl 6 outdated relationship phrases you don't need. What exactly does it mean to be polyamorous? Go Green 17 cute green outfit ideas for St. You decided to meet and on your first date things go great. Generally everything feels wonderful. However there is one problem: I had touched on a similar topic last year in my post my boyfriend has kept his online dating profile active.
First off let me say that many men keep their profiles active even though they are interested in the woman they are regularly dating. They like having women contacting them…even if they are rejecting all of them as it makes them feel desirable. If you think this is annoying I definitely understand but I would still encourage tact when you try to resolve this issue.
In some cases, this could cause what he saw as a healthy, budding relationship to end abruptly. I even had one reader who had gave the man a hard time the day after their first date when his profile was still up. I have been dating a man I met on Match. We have a great time together and he calls every night to chat or say goodnight. I am really interested in him and I get the feeling that he feels the same way.
My issue comes with him still having his profile up, and with my curiosity getting the best of me, I check almost everyday just to see when he last logged on — seems to be every few days or so. I have read what you have written on this subject and I know you said that men are slower to remove their profiles than woman — so my question is how long is reasonable to wait for him to do this before you say something or begin to feel offended by it? His response actually makes me wonder if he even realizes that he could hide his profile.
Silly logic aside, I would ask any reader who has this issue the same thing I asked the woman who contacted me: Until the conversation happens, I would say it is fair for a guy to keep his profile up. Perhaps not nice or courteous but not unfair either. If you have agreed to be exclusive, things are easy: Where does he see this relationship going, exactly? As I discussed above, I would recommend against being aggressive or angry.
Still, these are areas you will need him to define. Try not to force them but at the same time you will want to look for opportunities let him know that you need to know where you stand with him. For example, at the end of a nice evening together especially if the two of you are commenting on how much you enjoy spending time together you could bring up your concerns on not knowing where you stand in the relationship.
These are tricky conversations and can be difficult to work your way into. However, I can give some general advice. Second, I believe the following guidelines can help when having your conversations:. A month is enough time to decide if you want to pursue a relationship further. Still, use your best judgment. One thing about the advice above is that someone women will want to start this process immediately after the first date.
As a matter of fact, making an issue of things at this point could create a problem when no problem previously existed. Just as some people have trouble committing, others are far too quick to try to do so. The reader above waited six weeks and I think that is very patient. In her case, it is very reasonable for her to expect her guy to offer some clarity on where he sees their relationship going.
To sum it all up: I would expect that within the first month of actively dating each other that you should have an idea of where you stand and I would expect his profile to be down. In the cases where his profile is still up, I would expect that another month after bringing up your concerns is all it should take for him to decide and it really should be much faster than this.
I met my boyfriend on an online dating website years ago. We dated for a year And then we moved in together. Everything was going great. He had mentioned getting marrired and I told him he was crazy. We even went shopping for rings in January. Then in Febuary, I was at home and i needed to use his computer to chek and email. My computer was occupied. HIs computer automatically goes right to his email. There was all these messages from the dating website that we meet on.
I clicked on one and there was his profile. I expected to see the original profile from when we first meet but this one was different and his profile picture was a picture of him and his daughter that we took after we moved in and decided to take family portraits to hang around the house.
The site was deleted and I never heard anything else about it. He totally denied that he was on the site and could not see how the picture got on it. I was not satisfied with his anwser so I kept a close eye on things. Everyone and a while I would get on his phone or computer and check. I never saw another email, there were no text from random girls, or phone calls that seemed weird.
We lived together over a year later and then he one day just moved out. He said that his ex did not want his daughter at my house anymore and that was that. HE said that he wants to continue dating me and that he wants to work on things. Things were tough at first but then they seemed to be getting better. We had an amazing day on Tuesday from start to finish. He suprised me first thing in the morning with an execpected visit, we went to a braves game that we had scheduled a week before and then he invited me to spend the night at his place.
I loved waking up in his arms again. I told him that it hurt to see him on the site and that i felt that everything was going good and i did not understand why he was on.
He said that I was making a big deal out of nothing. But after three years of giving my heart to him I feel that I deserve more than that, I feel that he is being disrespectful and dishonest if he is spending all this time with me and saying he loves me, we are even doing 5 love languages together to help our relationship.
A friend of mine said that he is a pisces and thats just the way they are. They like to look and the crave for attention from the opposite sex. She says not to worry at all. I will tell you that he does the same with his job though. He always will have one job and continue to look for a bigger and better job even if he has no intention of leaving the one that he has. I need to know if I should worry. This whole thing is eating me up. Juls — my personal opinion is that you have every right to be concerned.
I mean, the guy moved out with no warning. You can read a book together but if he turns around and starts putting a profile online, what good has it done? Were I in your situation, I would make it clear to whomever I was dating that absolute commitment was of the utmost importance to me.
I would just be concerned that this type of game could continue for years. I deleted my profile ages ago, but this afternoon I had a look and he is still using it. He even used it last night, and I just dont know what to do about it. I think he likes me. But I just dont know how to really tell if his idea of a relationship is the same as mine or if he just wants to date. I try to kind of ask, but he always makes me feel so stupid for asking, as I should and think I trust him. But I just dont know.
Its been 4 months. Should I ask him to take it down or…. I met him through an online dating site six months ago. We have been dating regularly ever since. He talks marriage, knows my ring size, and talks about our future and potential children. He will be turning 30 soon and I am 6 years younger. About a month ago, I complained about his dating profile still being active. We definitely argued a bit and I told him to go on a date, if he liked the girl, we were done obviously.
Nevertheless, I was shocked and disappointed when he told me one morning that he had been on a date. A week ago, I brought it up again. I asked if we were exclusive and he said yes. He said he loved me for the first time and I said it back. What am I supposed to make of this?
A fear of commitment, soaked with very, very committed conversation and feelings? I was quick to let you know how much I loved my wife but every time I told you this I also punched her in the face.
What would you think of our relationship? Would you be amazed by the love I have for my wife? The thing is, words are easy.
Saying I love you to someone is easy. Showing you love someone is harder. To me, this guy is saying he loves you but he is not showing it. If I were in your situation I would feel a mix of hurt and anger. I mean, when IS the point where he would take his profile down? Married for 5 years? If he really loves you and agrees you are exclusive, the profile needs to come down.
Re-enable your profile, let him know that you no longer consider your relationship exclusive but you hope to continue to date him, and then start looking for other guys to date. The goal is to find a guy who will both say and show that he cares for you. My hope is that he would come around. What if that happens a year from now? All that wasted time waiting for him to make the right choice only to have him start dating someone else. I have a similar problem — I began dating a guy on match.
On our 5th date, he asked if we could become exclusive. I was very happy, as he is great. Any advice would be much appreciated! Is that not the same thing? It would be the same thing to me if I asked a woman to date me exclusively. But again, maybe I misunderstand what exclusive means in this case. We met on a dating website, and the relationship took off right from the start. After the first week he was asking me to be his girl. After that i did what any respectable women would do and i deactivated by online profile.
He however did not, at first it did not really bother me. I mean I just met the guy, who am i to say that he cant. Week two came and i found that while i was waiting for him to respond to a text I sent 45mins he was on the dating website from his phone. This infuriated me, and to my utter shame i called him out immediately. Now the only reason i knew to look and see if he was on there was this gut feeling that i got. Call it intuition, but somehow i just new.
Well he blew up and i blew him off for three days till he finally manipulated me back into seeing him through constant texting. Cause unfortunately in my world if you like me, well that makes one of us. So this was just the tactic he needed to reel me in hook line and sinker!! Week four, another I love you, and a few more fun filled evenings. Yet my gut says there is something not right about his profile being up still.
His excuse was he did not have a computer, only his phone to access, and there is no way to deactivate from a mobile device. I got another funny feeling one day, agian while waiting for his text.
I checked, and again i was right on the money i should have read this blog before so i did not do what i did again I called him out, this time he flat out lied and got verbally abusive. Well I got smart. And lets just say that because i went out for a girls night instead of hangin with him, that he responded to this other woman. I would also like to include in here that she has sent him text messages from her phone, and is talking about setting up a date with him.
I have also made myself avaible for this same night. He will however be stood up by the imaginary women, then the following day, I will tell him that I am no longer interested in seeing him. Hi Brad, Wow after reading many of these stories I have somewhat of an undertstanding that this is not uncommon. We have taken our relationship to the next level if you can call it a relationship intamacy is great.
How do I let what would normally be a wonderful relationship if it were not for his dating profile progress, or how do I let it go? I met a guy online we hit it off really great. I had spoken to him several months before we met.
I took my profile down and never asked him if he did or not. I felt if he was into me then he would without asking him to. He was moving the relatiosnhip way to fast wanting to move in etc. I asked him to back off and please take it slower. Well I found out he is now with a seperated lady he met online. You just never know but I have given up on online dating.
We started being exclusive at least I was. I do not trust online dating anymore too many bad experiences and too many shady characters. Sorry to hear your experience went that way Kelly…I promise not all guys are bad though! There are some great guys using dating services but sometimes it takes having a good deal of patience to find them. I agree with the advice here — especially the timing — and acknowledge that girls tend to overeact in these matters of the heart so maybe we could all do with a bit of advice to slow down a bit.
I am surprised to hear so many experiences similar to mine. I am not a lonely or desperate woman and like to think I have a great life and great friends. So I can see how the boys would struggle to manage that and think that continuing conversations online harmless… It is an enormous confidence booster, flattering to receive attention and the thrill of first dates really good fun.
My thoughts are that YES a girl makes this decision more quickly — instinctively not wishing to harm the budding relationship. And NO a guy views dating so differently to us that it can only be expected that removing his profile is repeatedly a delayed occurrence. If that is the case, how long to you tolerate such lack of respect for YOU, for the investment you are making of your heart and your life?
Lets retain some reality, because being online is so surreal and the rules of engagement so different to real life that some surely find it unbalancing.
The principles are the same. If being online and chatting to other girls was face to face lets say and you met a man in this way. Would it be acceptable if he continued to go along to such events and chat and flirt with other girls? Maybe even go on dates etc? So how on earth can it be acceptable to do it online!? We carried on as usual. He kept his profile online and then during a period where he was busy he removed the profile.
I relaxed and began to enjoy the journey, tentatively falling a little by little for him. Last week he activated it again. I asked to understand why. He said he was checking for my profile and was curious. He asked me if he should take his profile down? I said it was up to him I want him to take it down because he wants to not because I want him to… I did say that him keeping his profile active made me feel that he wished to keep his options open and that if he wanted me to feel that way then to carry on.
He remains curious and I increasingly uncertain of where I stand. And even after all this thinking and reading: I am still not sure how to handle the situation.
I still think its about respect… and not so much about committment. I am not asking the guy to committ to me and plan weddings and babies. I am only asking — in these early stages — for respect enough to put all the other girls aside for a moment… Is that really too much to ask? That might seem like semantics but I can see where a guy is coming from if he felt like it was commitment.
That said, I do agree that in many cases respect is also playing a large role. I know you make a case for not doing this in your comment but I worry that there is some risk in expecting a man to recognize:. The assumption that guys see things just as women do is risky business…especially if you are rapidly ending relationships based on that assumption. Finally, I think you should have been more honest with your guy. Sure, there is a degree of romance in having the guy take down the profile on his own.
However, if we use your examples of the real world versus online dating and really a case that you appear to make that they should operate more similarly: Instead, actually verbally ask it. Hi, i thought i was the only one in this situation. Ive been with my boyfriend 3 months, we spend every weekend togther and plan to do things.
He asked me a month into the relationship to be his girlfirend ive met his family and friends. I thought everything was going well. I stupidly rang him and asked if he wanted to be with me. I never gave the guy a chance to make any changes. I can be rather forthright in these matters — the usual sympton of having been hurt terribly in the past and made a fool of etc. I just finished it on the assumption that he had had plenty long enough to decide if he liked me a little bit or not.. When I think back I am surprised to find that each and every time it was I who decided when he should have an opinion about me, I decided when he should take down his profile and actually I decided everything about timing etc based on my instinct and my feelings.
I now realise that I never actually asked outright for any of them to take down their profile to be with me exclusively. I never actually asked! It never occurred to me that I could, that it was an option. You have given me real food for thought. I need to change. Thank you very much for your perspective! So… I guess the question we all want to know is: How is it okay? It really confuses us girls. Its really illogical to us. Its a kind of betrayal.
Does he really truly think that its going to be okay with me? We proceed to see each other two more times, before I went on vacation for 5 days to Cancun alone. I will add that he texted me at the end of our first date to say he had a great time and proceeded to text me everyday after that.
I heard from him twice while away — one sentence texts, with no greeting or emoticon — I answered and then he never responded — both times were like this.
His job is stressful right now, but in my mind, if you like someone a minute or two to send a quick hello is not a big deal.
I just want to share another way of looking at it…so maybe you need to change but maybe not. At the end of the day, I think everyone needs to make decisions that they feel are best for their own situation. Second, in your response to Cat, not all guys are like this. I was thrilled to have found something special and I cancelled all of my future dates as soon as I got home from my date with my someday-to-be wife.
I also removed my profile immediately. Cat — I feel like your situation is more straight-forward. In your case, he asked you to be his girlfriend…he needs to cut out the unnecessary continuation of online dating now.
Ive broght it to his attention so I hope it is removed soon. I feel better after talking to him. My situation is similar to a lot of these. I had been dating a man that I had met on match.
After about 3 weeks he wanted us to be exclusive. After about a month of dating I hid my profile but noticed he kept his active. I never said anything as he was attentive and I am not the jealous type. Anyway, the past week, he has been acting very strange… Not returning texts, not calling, not making any effort at all. I checked again yesterday and he re-wrote it again!!
When I tried to call him and talk to him about it, he refused to take my call. He denied the accusation via text. He says that he changed his profile a long time ago and does not send or receive e-mails. He refuses to talk to me about it. So he can see if he knows someone…and then what?
Hi Brad, Glad I found this site. I met my guy 3 months ago. We dated for two months before we became intimate and I just assumed that we were exclusive. I took down my profile. He said he would.
I was really upset also was PMSing and asked if I had been wrong in assuming we were exclusive. I even told him I had to get his confirmation because I have trust issues with previous guys cheating on me.
Do you think he will change, or should I just move on and find someone else? I have only been seeing this guy for three weeks. I could see someone doing this for several reasons:. Those are just guesses but the fact that he took it down in the first place is the most interesting part to me. I sent the email not as an ultimatum but just as an FYI… and I am sure he will stay on line until he decides what he is looking for and if in fact it is in me..
He visited me one weekend stayed in a hotel , I visited him the following weekend stayed with him , two weekends pass and he came to visit me again this past weekend. We have a lot of common interests and have so much fun together, but have had a couple of awkward conversations about exclusivity and where this may be heading. His profile is still active and he checks fairly frequently.
Do I wait for him to bring it up? Christine — I do like your friends advice to continue dating others. I have been dating a wonderful woman for over 3 months that I met on match. I am committed to her and crazy about her. When we were a month into our relationship I told her I was not going to renew my Match subscription because I only want her. She later said she would do the same and we took off the auto-renewal but we both never bothered to hide our profiles.
A few days ago she offerered to help her friend with her match profile. When searching for profiles, my profile said I had been active within 5 days. She is now mad at me because she thinks I want to date other people and I am just like the other guys that hurt her. I told her I recently gotten an email and deleted it but I have not been on in a long time. I have read that many complaints from match is the status option is flawed and can be triggered from simply receiving and deleting a email from match in your personal account.
November 18, at 1: Any ideas on how I can get her to talk to me? If you do not know after a month of seeing someone if you would like to eliminate the rest to give her a fair shake, recognize that there is something that is not resonating for you and the best course of action is to be direct and tell her.
None of this one foot in the bed and the other on the floor while exploring options. If you two have ongoing sex in any form , have respect for yourself as well as her and anyone else you are whispering to in bed — and either become exclusive if its going well or let her find a man who knows her worth and would like to share life with her. If you both have a profile on match and have been intimate on more than one occasion, one or both of you should step up to the plate and discuss the options.
Are you both okay having profiles up and options available? Are you ok with having sexual relations with one another while your profiles are active? Are you ok with easier opportunities via online dating while shagging her? Would you be hurt if she did this to you and slyly hooked up with another guy? Would you be at ease knowing that if you are looking online you cannot give the relationship a chance? Are you ok that you may hurt both of you because opportunities come easier and in catalogue style online?
The rules and regulations on match. This cannot be said enough:. If you are able to set up a profile on match, you should familiarize yourself with how it works. You should know how the service works including the fact that a tracking cookie is on your profile associated with your email account. Lets get brutally honest now. Is it the ego? Why do you CARE and need to open a wink or email once you are exclusive?
The subject is in your email subject line and says: So and So just winked at you. WHY are you opening that email at all?
Guess what — if you did then you are not ready to be honest with her or yourself. If you had the conversation about killing both profiles there is NO excuse to open the emails or winks even now that you know the tidbit about the cookie auto log in I just told you about. Being exclusive means resisting temptation and focusing on the lady you are bedding and claim to be crazy about. Being crazy about her may not be enough if you have to check your match winks and mails. Its called self control or let her go find someone who will value himself and her enough to not open those tempting emails and winks.
My ex — same thing. He opened an email and my friends said he was online within 24 hours. He was sent to them as a mutual match and it showed that he was online that day within ONE hour after he had with me in bed the night prior. I did not flip out. I spoke with him about it. He agreed to take it down. The first time I asked he claimed to answer an email without logging in to a woman who asked him a business related question.
Is this not a dating venue? She can consult someone else. He said he replied out of respect. What respect does he have for me then? He cared less about our relationship. The second time I found him online I dumped him. He went bananas and said he was crazy about me. Then instead of apologizing he yelled at me for knowing. He claimed I logged in to check. I said show me where my profile is. My sister looked on her computer from he account as she is on there, too.
I am protecting myself from a man who HAD to answer an email to some woman on a dating site to be respectful. Even after three discussions and several screenshots as well as telling him HOW to delete his account and HOW to bury his cookie email tracks, he still could not resist. PLUS there is NO shame in publicly searching as a guest when he has or she has already lied or had been interested in emails and winks from people on there once exclusive. No I did not log in. I called match to make sure I did not falsely accuse him of being online if he was not.
They checked and said he had been. They also indicated that to open an email or wink from the service from the associated account would show them as online. Is it really bad of them to do that? The responsible party is the man or woman who has to open those emails to stroke their ego or satisfy what they think is a harmless curiosity.
Match member ignorance is not a defense. You are old and wise enough to read the TOS and have basic respect. If you play to your curiosity expect to lose that person. You are risking STDS,emotionally injuring people who deserve respect and maybe losing out on a really good person. In my situation he is now an ex for a reason. Finding out the basement roommate and he actually did have an intimate relationship after swearing up and down since July that he never touched her was the final straw of many in the red flags and numerous chances to be honest.
I find this truth out many many months after dating when she kept walking up into his house and always there when I came over. I finally pushed him and he admitted he and she had a sexual relationship a long time ago and that he had lied but he felt nothing for her then or now.
Denial is not a river in Egypt and you can do a non member search to check if he or she has lied to you before. No shame in protecting your biggest investment: Dave — receiving or deleting a match. So there you have it folks.
Enough dirt to cover your tracks. They are not looking out for you if they still are checking out the menu while proclaiming they are crazy about you. They can be crazy about you and still want to screw the basement chick. Hey Dave — you might try sending her here to see that others have dealt with the problem.
I completely empathize with you. You've always know Jungkook for being hardworking and is a major workaholic. As his company expands and develops, he became busier, business trips and overtimes. At first, you feel bored and lonely, then you'd feel neglected, especially when you are alone at nights. You endured it but then, you became paranoid, thinking he might have other woman outside and that sorta kinda things. You have been married for two years, Jungkook gets more successful than he already is, you are very proud of him but you start to lose self-confidence, seeing him getting more successful, more manly, more sexy, you think that you are not suitable for him.
While you're a full-time housewife. You don't apply make up anymore since you're always at home. When you're bored you eat, then sleep, then lie on the sofa watching k-drama. Although you do all of the house chores but you eat more than you work; thus getting paler, fatter and older every single day. A big drop of self-esteem. Log in Sign Up.
Imsges: no were not dating but he still mine
You endured it but then, you became paranoid, thinking he might have other woman outside and that sorta kinda things. He has also updated his description. I notice shes still going on this same dating website we met on I had taken mine off since we met but this worries me so much that i asked if she still went onto the site and she said she did..
At the same time, I think I have a tendency to rush things or date people with whom i have CRAZY chemistry with; thus naturally rushing things physically and in turn, emotionally. About a month into dating, I knew I really liked him and wanted to see where it was going to go. I took mine down right away and I just figured he always had his up.
My issue comes with him still having his profile up, and with my curiosity getting the best of me, I check almost everyday just to see when he dating preferences racist logged on — seems to be every few days or so. Just to play devils advocate: I only work hour days, and then i was back to staying at my place but we were still constantly seeing each other. They also indicated that no were not dating but he still mine open an email or wink from the service from the associated account would show them as online. What should I do? So yes, he has had his up.
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