5 Signs A Girl Has Daddy Issues
Why do you always find ways to make her look bad? February 6, at 7: I continually pushed him away, so he stopped after a while. Be who you are. Looking for a free preview? So have you blossomed into a seasoned con artist?
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November 5, at Yes I agree actions speak louder than words but from my experience men who were feeling things were using words too. June 16, at 4: Chris you broke a promise! He is not a dead beat dad, that is not the type of person Chris is.
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So I am sort of an odd ball that way. But I have enjoyed most of it. I think on this site there are many fakes both SD and SB. I also think some of each have weird or unrealistic expectations. I seen a few SB profiles that seemed to have inflated expectations.
The painful reality is there are far more SB than SD. I have been MIA for quite some time. My schedule is a cruel experiment in the limits of pain thresholds and mental punishment. Michael, I can be quite opinionated too, my teachers hate it when I point out their mistakes: I hate it even more when they ask flawed questions so it is not possible to answer correctly!
I agree with you completely. Whatever happens in the bedroom is fine, but if it follows you outside, there is a problem. The largest problem is when there is nothing outside the bedroom.
I cut off contact from all the people like that in my life some time ago now. With a problem like that, I count myself lucky. The long distance seems to be a problem, regardless of wealth. People of all shapes and sizes seek convenience. And by real life suitors, I mostly mean, turning people down as nicely as possible and hoping no drama results from the situation.
Some people think your willing to sleep around simply because you are gay…and get angry when you say no. Best of luck to you though. This site hasnt worked out very well for me but its cool cuz I seem to find good men in person. But, does this site work for you guys? Or what has been going on? It seems a lot sketchy ish guys that only check this so often are on here … slightly annoying but I think one time itll work out.
Alright… Ill try to check this often but forgive me I do not … School, work, and more work …. Agree this gay sugar blog seems to keep dying. Hope some others can chime in, even if only from time to time. You would think a bunch of gay men would have something to say…. I have done a great deal of that stuff, not because it was my kink, but my partners wanted to play at various things, and if I gave them what they wanted I got what I wanted — even if mine was tamer.
It was hot too. I agree someone with a sense of humour is charmer in their own right. Laughing is more fun. My meetings with my SB have been fun for the few we have had. Both of us are sort of busy. With him in the picture I am putting off joining SA for now. In one sense I am trying to develop a feel for how to approach all this. SB certainly seem to be diverse in their expectations.
School can be fun, but also develops a tedium as you want to get on with it. I was at university in my 30s and really enjoyed it. Was very outspoken in classes, and not always endearing to profs, tho most liked that it certainly livened up the classes. Generally, a refreshing change even if the chemistry could be better. I think I may forever be searching for the gay version of Steve Martin I admit, I have a very large crush on him.
Generally, I love people who are charming with a sense of humour. Have you taken the plunge to join SA? How are things going with your potential SB? It can be insanely competitive…and I can be a bit obsessive lol…to the point of eschewing eating for perfecting unimportant details that no one will ever see. How is life treating you? I know you mentioned how busy you were before, have things slowed down enough for you to start enjoying the end of summer?
Your closet case will probably drop you like a hot potato when you do not put out. IF he sticks about, then you may wish to evaluate him differently over time. One of my best pieces of advice would be to take your time, do not let yourself be rushed, regardless of who it is. As for door number 2, if he can handle you being on your own, it could develop nicely.
I am very leery of anyone moving in with me on short notice — seen too many disasters with my friends, so have never done that myself. Good on ya for architecture school and so on. Nothing wrong with gradually moving out of the shell so to speak, but at a pace comfortable for you.
So long as that continues, there is potential. I think for any SB, surrendering independence is an issue, so you should think it out first. As for my new SB, second major meeting is about to happen, and it is promising for now. It has gone better than I expected. Most people when they meet me relax if they are good at reading people, as they realize I am a no bs type, and even friendly! What type of friendship do you have with the SD?
Do you talk to him often? What changed for you to start liking or considering mature men? I hope your sugar search is going well. Thank you for the well thought out advice Michael! Nothing will happen with the closeted guy, I just hate having to say no to people or cut them out of my life. I have an irrational need to be friends with everyone and drama free. He is controlling with certain things, like the food we eat. The idea of being dependent on someone else really freaks me out.
I would have trouble asking him or anyone to pay for that for me, or discuss how someone might spend money on me. Have you set up the second meet yet? Let us know how it develops. The closet case who is pressuring you to have a sex only relationship with him on the sly is the sort I generally recommend against. Basically if he gets what he wants sex with you he is indifferent to others, usually including you. Lying is to my mind and my experience a self-destroying behaviour.
I would recommend you be cautious if you pursue anything with him — and yes I recognize an incredibly brief description by you above is not the most objective way for me to evaluate him. Besides you are uncomfortable, which basically tells you to either avoid it, or wait and see. As for your rich BF or SD, his pressuring you into moving in with him seems potentially controlling. I would suggest you discuss your goals in life school, hobbies etc and see how he responds.
In this situation you could be frank and discuss barriers for you eg paying books and tuition as an evolution of your goals etc. Note how he responds, is it possible to steer him into the sugar relationship you are already seeking? You may have to speak obliquely initially, but then it depends on how he responds. To borrow a popular political phrase: You may be able to get him to let you live separately pro tem, and then decide gradually if you wish to try living together.
Depending on your province, you will likely be adjudged to be common-law after two years of living together and should he break the relationship, you have legal grounds.
If he is also new to coming out, he may be in a hurry. If he has been out awhile he should probably know better. In his place I would be thrilled to keep you living apart, but where we spend time together etc.
Yes even if you are drop-dead gorgeous, it is better to take my time and work with you that way. IF you want to see if he is controlling, how does he treat you when you are together? From little things to big things, they all add up. Not to mention how is he towards others. If you are really bold, ask him about previous young men he dated, there will be lots of clues there. Hope you will enjoy the blog too. Tis good if we have our own gay one, the issues are different from the other side of the fence, but of course not always.
To answer your question, I am not in a relationship and generally no longer am seeking that. I think a friendly SB with whom I have a connection, would do well for me.
I looked for a lover for over 25 years and I have gotten bored with the hunt so to speak. A lack of good results will do that to ya. I have recently been seeing a young man, who I met elsewhere. Am setting up another time with him and so far so good. He was much friendlier than I expected, I was expecting someone shy, which he is not! One of my preferences see my posts above is to be honest, so I would not be having affairs on the side etc.
Hi Stephen, and lurkers. They provide no support of course, I support myself. Thoughtfulness is a big turn on for me. They just have more experience and know how to treat a person, no drama.
My situation is becoming more complex by the week lol. He wants me to move in with him and we just went on a trip to a major city in the US. He wants to go somewhere else before I return to school. I have been somewhat of a lurker on the site as far as my sugar daddy seeking. When i first joined about a year and 3 months ago I got a few responses, and i had one date planned with a potential, but I skipped it because I felt guilty about my boyfriend — which I now regret.
I like what you guys have done with the place. Physically I tend to be attracted to all types of guys. How has your sugar journey been going? Are you in a relationship? Have you been or do you want to be? I guess I fit the stereotype for the older, distinguished man as well.
I think Young-Looking for the 1 may have disappeared…. Have you had much luck in finding SDs on here? What are you physically attracted to? Well what do I look for physically? On the other hand, I insist on brains, I need someone to talk to!
Ironically I get along very well with young people, as I do meet a fair number in my life. And SisyphusSB, I can do the suit routine very well, but almost never bother.
I am a blue jeans and denim shirt sort of guy. I was just teasing Michael. I know, as you said in previous posts, that you are honest. I am the same way and I suspect if honest people started to lie, they would not be known as the well respected, loyal person they are, for much longer. What are you usually attracted to Michael? What about you, Young looking for the 1? Obviously nothing is written in stone, there are always exceptions. Well I could have blossomed into a seasoned con artist as all my friends do trust me as I just refuse to lie.
Some personal issues I might decline to discuss, but I would disclose that, yet keep my dignity. The benefits are obvious, I keep my integrity [important to me anyways] and my friends still trust me after all these years [also important to me]. So I am not a con artist, as I do not want to be. For Young for the 1: The initial SB I will contact will be local ones, partly as it is safer and of course easier. IF they do not work out, I will move further afield. Then my plan is to visit them if possible.
In that case I think most people would already know if they are going to, or willing to, sleep with that person especially in the gay community where things seem to move quicker. As for the chemistry…we are all neophytes in this game called life! I do not want to be in constant competition with an ever changing cast of bar stars lol.
If drinking is involved, I would rather it be at home or in a lounge where we can passionately debate argue? Haha…yes, wet indeed…another reason I stay away from partyers. I found it all quite entertaining of course.
The number of those who have lied to me is very high, and unfortunately for me, the number of those who have done it successfully is very low. I think being able to see through people actually puts one at a disadvantage. Ignorance is bliss right? So have you blossomed into a seasoned con artist? There have been a couple, that after a few emails, we both pulled back…if someone is disinterested in me I am generally also disinterested in them.
I tend to mirror the personalities around me so if someone is quiet or anxious, they make me feel anxious and more introverted. There was only one who I talked with quite extensively who surprised me when he disappeared.
It completely baffled me and I have given up trying to understand it. How short was the email? Was there anything else to it aside from what you wrote here? If you genuinely want to get to know him you should show it in your email. Ask questions you might have and let him get to know you as well. Are there any other gay lurkers that would care to share any success or failure they have had in their search?
I think the other aspect of honesty that sets people back is that dishonesty is pronounced in the gay community. Gay men learn to lie very, very effectively to keep their closet when they are young. As a result many of them grow up thinking that is how you have to be, to be gay. Just think about how many gay men you met who were really good at lying to you! Is it a big number?? For Sisyphus, yes, IF I were to make any such offer, I would have wanted to chat a lot on the phone, not to mention some emails etc, basically to the level of at least some of the framework for any arrangement — which ensures we are compatible on things like expectations etc.
I was rather brief on my last blog entry — always a tricky thing to judge. My own take is that I think the personal compatibility is going to be the toughest, and that really is chemistry. I suspect as a neophyte that it is different from say online dating, but there are some overlaps. I also like intelligence, I need a conversation! Plus the less drama the better. To some extent students or someone with a life that is going somewhere appeals the most to me. I would be curious to hear from both of you on your take on the chemistry side — Young for the 1, that could be the silent treatment you got — then again, you are literate, which might put some SD off, but I would recommend you stay literate!
The comments from both of you are insightful and useful, which I hope will bring me some luck, if not success when I have the time to approach a SB or two.
Good luck for both of you guys. Micheal — Your offer is kind of what I would hope for if I was going to come visit. I seem not to go much further than an email or two. And normally the emails are like I think we are a match, we should talk more and arrange something, but then all the sudden they go quite after I reply with a positive but slightly hesitant response.
Young Looking for the 1: As far as sex on the first date, I never say never, but it would be a rare thing.
I am always safe regardless. I also have no idea how one might broach the subject of an arrangement. I know exactly what you mean as far as the honesty thing. I am very honest, especially in my writing and it is surprising, if not off-putting, to some people.
As far as the hooking up issue, if I liked the person I was with, it would be something I want to do, and therefore would not feel like an obligation in any way. I think you are spot on in your thoughts on the SB community. In some ways, this site is simply a tool to expand my dating pool with a potential for other benefits.
Perhaps, instead of dinner, there might be a more suitable activity to break the ice, like taking a walk, or doing something unique for that city if the person has never been there before.
Have you had any luck yet? My original thots for long distance SB would be either fly to meet them now my favourite — but with my schedule difficult or bring them to my city. Basically my plan would have been a lot more generous than what you were offered, ie I would book them a hotel in my city for the duration which I viewed as an easy escape for either of us.
I intended and still intend to pay both such a hotel and the flight. Seems only fair to me, but I have always done my own thing, and I am so honest most people view it as surprising. And generally I would set the first date as dinner only, just to meet, greet and develop an in person rapport, so any the following days is avoidable for either party.
As for hooking up, yes I think there is a different perspective in the gay community, which is why I like this separate blog. In negotiating the visit — to either city, I would include a blunt request for a hookup, but I would also offer some spoiling in return. But I think being very honest and including some escape routes for both sides, I would be taken seriously. Am not sure how much SB have viewed other SB profiles, but there are some mighty different expectations that way. I think some of the SD on this site view all the SB as being in dire financial situations, which I think is very inaccurate.
Many SB seem to be after some mentoring and a boost so to speak, but could continue without it if nothing comes of this site. In other words you could pass on any SD you viewed as a jerk or worse. Then again if a SD or SB for that matter! The only caveat, make sure you explain yourself well via email or over the phone, am often amazed how badly some people do that! Ive been gone for a bit … SisyphusSB I definitely agree on the whole separate gay blog … but this will kind of due for now.
Mike — Ive met one and almost met another. Getting back to the distance, its really a interesting thing, I felt obliged to stay with the one I didnt meet because he was saying Id get my own room and stuff, but he flaked and I had to figure stuff out from there. It turned into a wonderful weekend for me so its all good, but it makes me nervous for going to meet an SD in a city far away. Im almost always not looking to have sex after saying hello even after a conversation … so planning on staying under the same roof doesnt appeal to me too much.
This was a bad experience in terms of trying to meet the SD… but lesson learned. The one I met was really nice and everything went well, it was all good, we talk at times still but we live far away from eachother and its always hard to tell whether I should commit or not.
We didnt talk about any arrangements and any time I mentioned coming to visit it normally meant me paying to come visit and him paying for dinner … Id rather be the one paying for dinner if the other one had to pay for a flight, but thats just me. Talking about the arrangement is hard, I never know how to go about it … Im probably different from the both of you in that Im not opposed to finding someone serious on here ….
What do you think is the best way to bring up an arrangement on here? Specially since hookups in the gay world kind of happen everywhere you turn …. Just one or two boulders…no more than anyone else I am sure. My union has assured me they will never grow in size and I will receive an excellent pension once eternity ends. As for the naughty…maybe just a little…I suppose it depends on who you ask.
Yep, I saw your posts. I agree with the no major problems aspect…for any relationship. No minor problems would be pretty great too but I think that may be asking too much. A friendly affair sounds about right lol, you should coin that term. Otherwise things would become stale quite quickly. SA really needs to put together an official gay blog. Does anyone else have anything to add? I wonder, are you busy pushing boulders up big hills? Have you done anything really naughty lately?????
You may have seen my post in Sugarpendence, but I would prefer an independent SB. Basically I do not want to babysit anyone. Am happy with the idea of mentoring if my skills and knowledge are transferable to the SB. In a sense I am seeking an affair, that is still warm and friendly, without it being thought of as likely to become permanent.
Right Now, with benefits. Probably will approach the SB in my neck of the woods first, mostly for convenience. Must admit I am leery of the whole thing, but hey, I try things. I can be bold. A big one for me is personality, there would have to be some chemistry of at least casual friendship.
If he has to think of England during sex, I would not be interested in him. Of course, I am not expecting a real relationship from here, friends, or friends with benefits are ok too until I find something more serious.
I have yet to physically meet any SDs. They are few and far between north of the border. I have talked extensively with 3 all from the US. One has disappeared, the other 2 have become friends with whom I exchange emails on a regular basis. In my experience, people tend to prefer convenience and are not inclined to do the long distance thing. To Michael, what are you looking for in a SB? I did not really address part of your question.
For an email, I would expect some explanation of what you are after. It is surprising how divergent SB are and what they expect here on SA.
I am not after a life story in an initial email, but perhaps goals and if applicable why my profile caught your eye. I have met two SB socially who have ads on this site, but was not comfortable bringing up the fact I recognized them, partly it is a delicate topic in a public area to raise and also I am very busy with work.
One SB turned out to be pretty far out there in wild, which is not my scene — I am far too boring for him — er that is being diplomatic…. For both you and Sisyphus, how has your experience been in meeting SD? Met any, had any problems or successes? The answer, really, is it all depends. The rare time I see someone I want to send a message too, I more often than not get a response, even if it is a rejection.
There are many reasons, partly as I am insanely busy with several jobs at once altho I think I can solve that by the end of summer! I do try to review the SA site regularly tho, with a major goal of watching. It has been revealing. In my case I will be looking for honesty in a SB as it is probably difficult to make any arrangement based on dishonesty — remember I am a newbie too. I am an introvert, so if a SB is seeking a heavy social life, I think I would be rather a ball and chain from his perspective, so I would probably want someone compatible in that sense.
I think it will at times be similar to online dating, in wanting to get along, as no amount of spoiling will change it if you are not comfortable with me. On the other hand since I am seeking a nsa sort of arrangement friends with benefits — real benefits in my case!
What do you look for in an email from an SB? Will this ever be updated? I am willing to bet there is a very large pent-up demand in the LGBT community for articles to comment on…. No offense to them, but would like to here from my side of the fence. How would you want to meet a potential SD who lives far from you? Would you want him to visit you first or, what would encourage you to hop on a plane to fly to his city assuming the SD pays your airfare?
Comments and thoughts are welcome. I was wondering if any sugar babies try to get free tickets to the party?? I sent the email requesting for one…how long do I have to wait …anyone? I would love to find a man like that! Thats sorta what i have been looking for, but i havent been able to find a sd like that. And yael, ill be your sb! Can you change it? Yes, it will still take you to the main SA pages when you register… the gay page is not a new site, but it does give gay sugar daddies, sugar mamas and sugar babies looking for sugar on the web a clear signal that they are welcome on SA!
When you register, whichever settings you choose i. It goes to the the SA landing page, the only difference is the photos. If you register with it, it brings you back to the hetero site. Does that make sense? Stephan- okay so then where would you find them?? Do you put up a flag? Wave wildly in a crowd?? Check in closets with a flashlight??? I mean, what do you do??? I am so wishing you all the best.
Rich Closeted Gay Men: This is so great! Hopefully we can get to hear from some new people!! Im glad that sa is revolutionizing this makes me proud! We need to find something to bring them out of their shells!!
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He has not asked me to be his girlfriend yet and it has been almost 4 months. We hook up like 3 times a week. He has met some of my family and friends.
He use to text me back all the time and I would not text him that often because I did not want him to feel like I was blowing up his phone, But like I said he was really good about texting me back or he was always the one to text first. Should I leave him alone and just wait for him to text me? Or should I ask him if he is ok? I know I am not his girlfriend but he tells me he loves me. I am so confused. Men are not rabbits. Having sex with a man before you are together is O. He might be telling you he loves you so he can sleep with you.
Like I said, I suspect this guy is total garbage for you, so you really need to get serious with him. And is the only way you two communicate via text? Also, how long have you been sleeping together? Because if it has only been a couple weeks, chances are he is emotionally immature; he might be confusing love with obsession, which is unhealthy.
He has expressed concern of the distance repeatedly.. His response was we are not there yet.. But, yet says he wants me to move to him but in my own place..
If you want me to live by you, why not with you?? He say you are not there yet. Where is there to the place he is clear he wants to sleep with someone else or there he wants to dump you. Look my dear you have to have everything you want in a relationship before you go moving anywhere. He is not sounding secure,and stable in this committment yet. Have you talked engagement yet, seeing you as a lifelong partner yet? Have you met all the important people to him and he your people.
Are you feeling that he is in love with you, and you him willing to give you the level of a committment you desire? And what is up with if you dont move there it will be the end of you. Really well I hope you are moving for more then just him cause he sounds like this is a fun test for him. I would not move unless and untill he puts a ring on it or you have more reasons then him to move.
Dont ever move in with someone with out a sold agreement of what are your terms. What you want for this move. Dont let him tell you how your life is gonna go you do have some say you are the prize here.
Be empowered, be fem! You have your own life to manage let him him come to you. You are the sure one in this not him… Let him sell you on why you should move there!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
He is trying to find an excuse to dump you and may be cheating on you. DO NOT move to him. My boyfriend is very good and looking handsome. But he is very tough personality. In every fight he makes me that I am wrong. And then he treated me like nothing for him. And when I am trying to call him or msg he treats very rudely. I feel like, I have no self respect. Sometimes I thought that broke up this relationship but I have no dare to do this i love him so much.
Mainly we fight on this issue that he has no time for me. When we meet and discuss on this issue, he told me that in anger he forget all the feelings and he hates those person who fight with him. I love him so much, and he knows that. He also love me. It does not matter if you dump or not If you dont work on the relationship with yourself you will only attract another looser like him.
You must get your self esteem as high as you possibly can! Your answer will be so clear once you work on focusing on yourself. What you want in a career, education, health, spiritual life, financial, friends, what you want and what you are willing to do to have it. Focus on the type of relationship you want how you want to be treated and FEEL…. Ia m sure this is not how you want to be treated or feel so why put up with it. You dont have to be in a relationship. Get you right and a good person will match.
Sorry to sound so harsh, but you need to know that you are in an emotionally abusive relationship. You are being abused and neglected and NEED to leave him for your own health and well-being.
You will know when you have found the right person and he clearly is NOT it. I am sorry, but you need to hear it. Well written and informative. I feel a lot better about my love life as an independent woman and I am happy to have read such a great work of art. So many great points!!! Number 4 is oh so true! He lives 2 hours and a half away from me, he came to my door almost begging for me to come back, he was ready this time to be in a relationship and that he was sorry. He was so afraid of losing me cause I was practically breaking up with him that he drove 2 hours and a half to apologize and be in a serious relationship with me.
I text my bf goodmorning 3 days ago.. I say play the field. You should keep your options open and stop allowing one dude to have so much control over you. Although this is the exact way articles are normally written, but for males gain, try posting stuff like this and watch all of the men who would fear a world ruled by changing for women freak out. Redirected name calling, bullying, bashing, and out right unfocused anger because they have no logical reason to be upset.
I completely agree, why do women have to change in order to please a guy? Is terrible that people actully think this is how is should be, and i even worse that they publish this stupid things. This article is complete one-sided garbage. I have never seen an article telling men how THEY can improve, even though a lot of men seriously need to learn.
Men ARE capable of communication and I am so tired of articles giving excuses for them. It is time they listened to what THEY need to work on as well. I could have written your post. You can do better!! What if your best friend told yoU the same thing. What advice would you give her.
Men are in relationships for themselves. They want something from the other one. THEY— want to be wooed. Maybe a candle-lite homemade meal or a romantic happy-hour at his place. You get it, something simple. NEVER happened with several. I gave an gave and really got very little in return — actually nothing. I would visit him after work 10pm there was never any snacks or hot chocolate, no hot tea waiting for me, especially in winter!
No ice tea or lemonade in summer, either. They have to woo me — first. That only comes when both sides work at it. If it is not there move on i know thats hard but what this artical says is true.
In all seriousness, this is a good article. I am a guy and I just wanted to see what this was about, and she hit the nail on the head. NOW, all we need is a female version of this so I can feel better. All women are good for is to be impregnated and then kill them off after they give birth.
They are filthy sub-creatures. Can someone say jaded loser napolian syndrome. Probably drive a big oversized truck too because we know men with super small packages talk this hateful. It was the same pyschopath posting both times, the three minutes apart gives it away. All these articles claim men want more than anything to make their woman happy, yet I see very few actually even trying to.
As if a relationship should not involve any compromise or sacrifice. Fine then, stay single. They will be perpetually so anyway, with that belief. If you work in a job that employs mostly women, they only open their mouths to talk about — babies! They only bond with other women that have — babies! Another takes over their work when they leave to have a — baby. As far as school, they only return to show everyone the — baby and then drop out!
Their kids belong at — home, not out in public. Their raising whinny brats. They only care about themselves in a workplace or school setting. At this age, I understand why men cheat! A women delivered coffee to this office that I worked at, she was shocked that when the kids left to college, there was no relationship with her husband — he left too.
Wow you three have issues. Do you write just to stir the shit? I cannot believe you three think like this. Those brainless idiots made me laugh. They only exist to hurt women, to use us, and to discard us when they are done. No gender has a monopoly on inflicting damage. Just like I read stuff written for men I also read stuff written for women. What a waste of time. We went on a date and it was awesome. So I need to quit overthinking everything and just calm down. I was taking to a male and female co-worker one day during our break.
From personal experience, I dated this one guy and I was the ideal girlfriend I guess you could say. We spent about a year together I never had any doubts, I trusted him completely, and I felt that we completely loved each other. Turns out he had cheated on me about five months into our relationship and I was completely oblivious to it. I actually found out through one of my friends. I confronted my now ex and told me it was true.
I need some clarification as to what my male co-worker said. Spot on — especially the texting and freedom part. My freedom is the most important thing in my entire life along with my solitude. I have frequent short-term sexual relationships, but it inevitably all turns up the same. I get a text from my best male friends and I go days without answering, and most of the time I just never answer.
I have a very specific set of ideals. If a woman is not able to give me space, it signals to me that she has no life. When a woman begins getting hung up about every little text and phone call and what the tone of my voice means, then I know emphatically that she is weak, that she has no life, that she has no goals. However, I doubt that will ever happen. Very interesting that you are comfortable with being alone yet you are on a website about relationships and dating.
I think when you meet the one, whatever that exactly is for you, you might have a change in ideals. It is healthier to be in relationship because you want to be not need to be. Neero, I am sure that if you traveled the whole world, you will find someone who is not only a renaissance girl, but someone who inspires you.
I have seen what can happen to a person who has no real friends. A girl who inspires you will always be different, not only because of what makes her unique, but also for her sense of comfort with herself. Most girls I have met are concerned about mundane things, such as texting or cup sizes. There are girls out there who are passionate about what they do, like me, and you should be a part of their life, not their whole life as you said.
I hope you find your destiny. I hope you find your best friend and love, for that in my opinion is the best kind of relationship. Mine told me he traveled all over the world while serving our country, and all he had to do was go around the corner, and there I was. I hope you find the love of your life worth going to the stars and moon for. You come off as very arrogant, selfish and immature.
Real strong, stable and independent women will not want men like you. You project your own thoughts onto women and disrespect them without trying to understand. Well let me tell you: They want a man — someone with strength as great as theirs, and not a boy — someone who just does as he pleases.
With your standards, you will only find someone like you instead: As a person yearning and reaching to be a wondering writer such as yourself, I agree and understand that having the ability to go anywhere, anytime and do anything is important. Classifying every woman as needy and controlling is not fair since their actions stem from your same need, to feel secure in something, not that you were grouping all women.
The need to feel safe is not met, we lash out in fear, and you are driven further away by your clostrophobic fears. You get your distance, she gets support. Then you travel the world experiencing everything with a mind as adventurous and cunning as your own, and nothing feels better than that.
And never quite got it. I have been told to play head games, mirror their image. That all sounded like too much work. Who wants to make keeping a boyfriend your full time job. Your article just tells it like it is. No scamming with a build up to make you buy a book.
You spoke in lamens terms, and it made me giggle, and smile, and look at my man in a whole new light. I have recently split up with my ex.. This article was really helpful. Especially the part about withdrawal. Thanks for your help.. Answer this my man left me after 2 years because I would not go out and sleep with other men. You deserve a better man than him. What if all the no-no that you have mentioned above is done by the guy instead? How do I deal with it? My ex-husband was very kind at first , somewhere along the line he became a devil, my new boyfriend is acting like a robot being over nice ,promising me marriage , saying he wants twelve..
Like seriously and what help ed me not to fall for this was experience and relationship advice. Now he wants twelve babies out of wedlock, I told him you use Condoms and everyone is happy , cos I will never be pregnant for a stranger, when the fun is over we all go our separate ways without baggages. I am sorry for any girl that falls for such guys. So he broke up. I am so heartbroken but I work on myself and that gives me my joy and happiness.. Their failed relationship is a proof of their unsuitability for marriage business.
And these kind of women are always men hating, men killing , men nagging, men shaming feminists. I know some guys will still go ahead and remarry these idiots. I am a single mom and my failed relationship was due to him cheating while I was at he with our 5 week old baby.. We are all different with different happenings in life. So texting is my primary mode of communication. I really liked this article.
With regards to the texting I have some questions though. He is awesome in person but makes very little effort over texts. Yeah he never ignores my texts and he shows interest when I ask him out. Is it too soon for this kind of behavior? Babe he him some time. He will likely miss you if you play your game right.
Now this is the game plan: Each time he calls you or texts you, act really happy and excited. Do this even when you guys cross paths. All these should happen within 30 seconds.
You will see him rush immediately and he wil even forget he needed time off completely. I text him but he reply after some days…plz plz plz tell me what to do? When they play Prince Charming early in the relationship, they should be a little more understanding that women are going to have hurt feelings when they stop this behavior out of the blue, without explanation. There are plenty of men who are sincere and let the relationship progress at a healthy pace, thereby avoiding the freak out mode.
Men who pour it on thick in the beginning, only to call you needy when you return the gestures are not good men to be with. If they do this, just move on. The more we give into this behavior, the more it becomes accepted. Thank u sooo much for this article! It was really helpful for me and explained a lot of things that I was previously confused about. Hey, This is such a great read! I have a question: That is, that a man will automatically make plans to see you and he will WANT to make plans?
Or does the idea of making plans for men equal losing their freedom? And therefore it is something to avoid, even when they commit to you? Can you puts things straight for me please. Whoa, girl, that guy is bad news. You said one time in a comment that, Men only invest in a relationship but I forgot the res tof the comment. Can you refresh me? But i am in problem , i am engaged girl its 2 months ago but i know he is not at all interested in me from starting we dont have love relation it is arrange marriage i dont thing so he ever fall in love with me.
I cant break this engagement coz of family but i really want solution please highlight some solutions i am subscribed to nem mode also. He is not in love with me but he is not behaving anything bad with me his behaviour is good with me but he doesnt love me.
Hi Gita, I feel for you, actually I dont believe in love but I also DO NOT believe in forced marriage, every individual has the right to chose who to marry or choose to stay single if they wish. Have you spoken to your parents or to the guy about how you feel?
Hello Helen, My parents have very simple living and thinking so they suggested to continue. Yes i talk with my fiyancee i said indirectly also and directly also that u dont like me but he is saying it is nothing like that. Dear Gita, Your problem seems to be the traditions of your culture. You can either choose to go ahead with the marriage and risk a life of no love but with the possibility of peaceful co existence OR tell your parents you do not want to go ahead with the marriage.
From what you wrote it sounds like you have some feelings for the guy. Wear your hear for him. I dreaded him coming home from work. I got a new relationship and we were the best of friends, lovers, partners. Pay attention to current events, have an opinion about something. Men want a friend, an interesting partner in a relationship, whether a girlfriend or wife. Oh, be a good cook. Good food, good conversation can bring you close, closer.
The ex — when he left said about the new one, She — can really cook! He is all about actions and the texting part is definitely just a sign that he is still having his own life as I do as well. Thanks again for such a well put article. I really do love all your practical advice: I love how this is an article about men wrote by a woman. I might as well write an article about how to to breast feed your newborn. Thank you so much Sabrina! The article made perfect sense to me! Although I learnt to deal with everything that is mentioned here, but sometimes you start getting in doubt… Reading this article every time gives me loads of positive energy and helps me stay strong and happy!!
Thank you very much! Richie — is there a specific point or points you disagree with? This artical is total BS. Totally one persons opinion through out the whole thing, and you should stop reading this trash unless you are trying to be just like the author.
I knew all his friends and frankly I really liked most of them and I got along with their girlfriends and them so it was never a big deal to hang out with them.
That part about men wanting to make women happy? When either Sabs or I write something, we speak to the things you can control — your actions, your reactions and your thoughts. I have never read dating advice online.
This site is awesome!! Me and my bf have been together almost 3 years. The past couple weeks he has not been texting me as much. In the past he has called me multiple times a day and texted, being more needy then I am in general. We talked tonight about how I feel ignored lately and I asked him whats up. He said he just has been busy and wants to feel like a man, not a guy in high school, calling to just tell me he loves me a few times a day, he wants me to focus on finishing college, and have my own life and do what i want.
I think he feels too dependent and needy making him feel less of a man. After reading this he wants more freedom maybe.
So for other girls reading this, it works both ways!! Worry about yourself sometimes, and not just pleasing him always. If you do your own thing and give some space, I think it makes men want you more. It makes me want him more too. Also, when something bothers either one of us, we say hey this is whats up and then we talk not argue and deal with it. So that is also true in this from my experience. So spot on, my boyfriend wants to buy me stuff but dislikes it when I constantly Ask for smth.
I also want to note that how much he desires your appreciation depends entirely on how much he values YOU as a romantic partner, and that has to do with how you inspire him and give him confidence, if you make your bf feel good about himself as a man, his desire for your appreciation will go up.
Helen, you have been hurt, and clearly more than once. However, I am here to tell you that you are not talking about men when you say that in reference to item 3. A real man, in touch with what he wants and how his actions effect others will always want to make you happy. The hurt game is played by boys who want to keep you unbalanced and at arms length.
I have a 16 yr old son, and much of this advice about men I can apply to him also in a way…I am truly feeling much happier and hopeful in life now that I am learning how men tick…. I will def be buying your books! What a load of rubbish, women, get back to banging your head on the table please.
Noone gives you the right to say what we think, or feel. Well actually it is indirect communication.. I read this article and feel depressed because I seem to be behaving more like the male counterpart. I am not male. Do other women experience this? Reading the article made me sad. About two months ago, I met what I thought was a wonderful man through a dating website. I felt he was different, I thought that he would never hurt me.
Few weeks after our first encounter, he admitted that he lied and hide some details about him. Well, I just told him that I understand why he was not willing to share his whole life with someone he has just met through the web. The next two weeks after his revelations were actually very great. I could sense that he really liked me. After those few days, he just stopped communicating with me. Texting was our only way to communicate. He canceled all of our meetings for about 4 weeks I did it once, but I have a very good excuse… medical reasons!
I know he has an erratic schedule, but he was basically spending all of his free time hanging out with friends. I was hurt, but I thought that I should not expect to become the center of his world after only few weeks. At the end of those 4 weeks, I was just mad at him, and discouraged. To be honest, my self-esteem is already low enough, it is not healthy for me to wait after someone who will perhaps never come to me.
I said that I was very deceitful because I really liked him, and that I was hurt that he could not even make an hour or so to see me. I felt that I was rude! Fine, I was fine with that… We continued to be in touch, and I finally agreed to see him at his place after his job on Sunday night.
At the end, we shared some intimacy touching and kissing. Anyway, on Monday night, I texted to know if everything was fine. And it really does hurt me.
I really try to be comprehensive, but it just seems that there is no room for me in his life. If he wants to be with you — he should find a way. If you are not available to him.. He may realize that he misses you. Either way , I relate to your story and know that the right person will always want to make it work.
This article is amazing. I have realised where i was going wrong in my past relation and what he wanted. Its true that guy need their space and their freedom. I think about the woman I love every waking minute. If you actually love someone, you can no more stop lvoing them than you can stop breathing…and either leads to death. There are people in my love that I love and would do anything for.
Even if they were no longer in my life. Are you suggesting that the only suitable men to be in relationships are extremely testosterone endowed? Would you recommend that men who are unsuccessful with women should just do steroids? That would be quite a world to see….
If u love people, it is ur present that u need to share with them, every moment. Otherwise, if u are lucky, yes maybe they will live long. Maybe they will die tomorrow. But near these days He starts replying me with no more than 3 words Is it suppose to be normal? Does he not care And he never texts me first Why?
It is clearly placing all men in a single category, saying we are all the same and thats that. I came across this article because all this is happening to me.
I always have to initiate calls and messages now. I know she is free and doing nothing and yet still doesnt find 10seconds to send a simple message. Its me who has ended up analysing, being frustrated and constantly waiting for the phone to ring. She comes to see me rarely, we have sex, then she leaves, now i just feel like im being used, it feels awful.
I cannot agree with the advice given in this article, every person and situation is different and cannot be generalised. Im with this guy for 5 months now, and he is ignoring me like to the max. At first, he was very very close to me. Now he says he is quite busy. But, when we talk or text, I really feel that he really cares by the way he talk. But recently, he is being like im a stranger.
Imsges: im dating a girl with daddy issues
May 20, at 7: NEVER happened with several.
The truth seems to be pissing people off around here! Oh I know Someone2 is Venessa…. Alright… Ill try to check this often but forgive me I do not … School, work, and more work ….
We had a blast talking to each other and after a couple of weeks went on our first date which went extremely well! What would be a good way of finding out? He used to be such a lover boy, im not saying hes not now i was just used with his nonstop texts and now he doesnt even text for a day or maybe i should text him first for him to replay. As much as my heart went out to him and wanted to pray that his father gets better and that dating apps with most users is able to re-establish a great im dating a girl with daddy issues with his father. What if all the no-no that you have mentioned above is done by the guy instead?
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